Renewal Seekers Are Life Disruptors
The Courage to Let Places Change You
It seems fitting to end this series with renewal. My journey creating these stamps and sharing on Substack has brought me to a place where I need to stop and assess how to move forward.
Trudge on? Refine and polish? Find something new?
There’s a lot of research on how we adjust to change, and a ton of variables that trigger our shifts. Sure, you could argue it all comes down to semantics. Change is change, whether you call it progress, adjustment, or transformation. As if it’s all the same beast, but it’s not.
There’s the change that life throws at you—divorce, job loss, illness—where you’re just trying to keep your head above water and survive. While these moments can surely bring on renewal, depending on our outlook and perspective, they’re fundamentally reactive. You’re adapting to something that happened to you.
Then there’s the change you go looking for because something inside you knows it’s time to shake things up. This is proactive transformation. It’s the kind where you sense you’re ready to grow and actually do something about it.
That second kind? That’s the renewal I was going for with this stamp. But the more I sorted through it, the messier, deeply personal, and intensely unique it became.
There’s a big difference between being pushed into change and choosing to walk toward it. Both can be transformative, but only one puts you in the driver’s seat of your own becoming. The Renewal Seeker stamp is for the places that bring us into new phases in our lives, push us to take on new interests, or help us double down on the parts of ourselves we want to boost up and expand.
The Renewal Seeker stamp is part of the Growth & Transformation pillar. For more information about the framework, see THIS POST.
Not sure if you are a Renewal Seeker? Find YOUR Places Stamp HERE.
Want more Renewal Seeker basics? See HERE.
Download the Renewal Seeker Planner & Journal at the bottom of the post.
This stamp is also about the quieter side of change. Those moments when you find yourself in places that help you figure out who you’re becoming. You walk in as one version of yourself and leave as someone slightly different.
I chose to focus on the type of renewal you actively pursue. Not the kind that life forces on you when everything falls apart, but the kind where you sense it’s time to grow and actually do something about it. It also includes recognizing when you’re ready for change and then finding places that support that transformation.
As I reflected on the places that gave me courage to break old patterns, I realized they aren’t exactly earth-shattering destinations, but they sure did break me open. I see this in therapy sessions, too. A client will share that they were just going along with their workday when suddenly it no longer seemed to fit.
As we walk through renewal together, I’ll share some of my own transformative places, with the caveat that their power had more to do with my readiness for change than with their inherent magic. I’ll also give ideas to help you seek out your own renewal places, recognize when you’re in a season of life that’s calling for renewal, and discover ways to make transformation happen.
Truths About Renewal
Let’s start with three truths about renewal that rang true for me as I shaped this stamp:
#1: Renewal is cyclical, not linear. We don’t just renew once and call it done. Like seasons, it happens again and again throughout our lives. Sometimes it’s subtle, maybe just a gradual shift in perspective. Other times it’s dramatic—a complete life overhaul that leaves you wondering who you were before.
#2: Renewal requires release. You can’t add new patterns or habits without releasing old ones. This is why renewal often feels uncomfortable. You’re essentially grieving parts of yourself that you’ve outgrown while simultaneously birthing new aspects of who you’re becoming.
#3: Renewal is both active and passive. Sometimes you chase it down by booking that transformational retreat or taking that leap of faith. Other times it finds you through loss, change, or unexpected opportunities that crack you open in ways you never saw coming.
Your Brain on Renewal
I always have to be clear about the why behind each stamp’s traits. With the Renewal Seeker, I went all over the place on the whys; probably because they are all so personal. Here are a few that seemed to stick:
Why We Resist It:
Fear of Loss: What if we lose parts of ourselves we actually want to keep?
Identity Attachment: We become attached to our stories about who we are.
Social Pressure: Others might resist our changes because it challenges their own stagnation.
Comfort Zone Addiction: Familiarity feels safe, even when it’s limiting.
Perfectionism: We wait for the “perfect time” or “perfect plan”.
Why We Need It:
With all this resistance, why on earth would we do it? Here’s a few that come to mind.
Evolutionary Advantage: Adaptation is how humans have survived and thrived
Psychological Health: Stagnation leads to depression and anxiety
Life Satisfaction: Growth and meaning are fundamental human needs
Resilience Building: Each renewal cycle builds our capacity to handle change
Four Renewal Focus Areas
So to clarify, we’re talking about the “take the bull by the horns” type of renewal. It’s what brings forth an active, positive approach to altering your life. I’ll walk you through four phases that keep showing up in my work and my life. These aren’t rigid steps you have to follow. They’re more like themes that tend to emerge when we’re using places to help us transform.
Certain places seem designed to help us recognize we need change, others help us let go of what’s not working, some push us to explore new parts of ourselves, and others help us figure out how to actually live as this new version of ourselves.
It isn’t in the places themselves. It’s in matching where you are emotionally with where you are physically.
Phase 1: You Seek It Out
While yes there are times the best changes to our lives are not our doing, this is the renewal you have at least some say over. But first, you need to recognize that something needs to shift. This often shows up as:
Feeling stuck or restless
Old solutions no longer working
A sense that you’ve outgrown your current life
Craving experiences that challenge or stretch you
Feeling disconnected from who you used to be
Ironically, once we recognize the need for renewal, we often resist it. If you are in a resistance phase of your renewal process you may be:
Making excuses for why “now isn’t the right time”
Clinging to familiar patterns that no longer serve
Fearing the unknown
Convincing yourself you should be grateful for what you have
These moments over my life sure made me uncomfortable, but that discomfort kept me launching into that next person I was to be.
A ski season in Aspen, Colorado. I was young and just out of college. I knew I was ready for somewhere new, but convincing myself to stay through an entire season—rather than running back to do what was expected—led to one of the most formative years of my life.
That winter taught me that sometimes renewal requires you to stay put long enough to let a place work on you, even when parts of you are screaming to retreat to familiar territory.
Phase 2: You Release to Make Room
Sometimes the best thing about a place is how far it feels from who you used to be. Maybe it’s a business conference in another city, an afternoon soaking at a hot springs, or a planned retreat. When we’re surrounded by something different from our day-to-day routine, it creates space for release.
And release may mean:
Letting go of outdated beliefs about yourself
Releasing relationships that no longer align
Clearing physical and mental clutter
Forgiving past versions of yourself
The places that support this kind of release may also require some level of disconnecting:
Putting your phone in airplane mode
Saying no to social obligations
Sitting with uncomfortable silence
Actually letting yourself be bored
The Dance of Disconnecting and Reconnecting
Before we leave this second phase, let’s think through the ways we disconnect AND reconnect. Two separate states that mirror each other in so many ways.
Often you have to disconnect to reconnect with yourself. And sometimes you have to reconnect with certain places or people to disconnect from old patterns that no longer serve you.
The Ice Bath in Latvia. Not original, I know. But there’s something about voluntary discomfort that recalibrates your relationship with what you can handle. I went in thinking I was proving something to the group of people I was there to impress. I came out realizing I was proving something to myself.
Now and then, I remind myself of this lesson with cold bursts in the shower. It helps me remember that release moment. Discomfort isn’t always bad, and I need to trust myself to handle whatever comes next.
Phase 3: You Explore and Discover
A place can become the perfect lab for exploring both your outer and inner worlds. Maybe it’s a physical challenge you didn’t think you could handle that suddenly gives you the courage to face other transformations in your life. With that mental space created, you start exploring who you’re becoming:
Trying experiences that would have terrified the old you
Visiting places that stretch your comfort zone
Experimenting with new ways of being
Allowing yourself to be a complete beginner again
This exploration phase is why so many people get hooked on travel. It’s not just about seeing new places, but discovering new versions of yourself. When you’re somewhere unfamiliar, you can try on different personalities, test new boundaries, and see what feels authentic.
A Camping Trip in the Middle of Nowhere. Three days with the closest cell service miles away seemed divine. Then my husband fell and dislocated his shoulder at the same time our truck’s transmission gave out.
Suddenly, our romantic getaway became a crash course in what really matters. Stripped of all the conveniences I’d grown dependent on, I realized how much I’d been taking for granted. And it wasn’t just modern luxuries, but my husband’s steady presence in my life.
Now I know you’re saying, “Wait, Natalie, you said this was about the change we seek out.” Good point. But while the crisis wasn’t of my choosing, it woke me up. I had to step into a version of myself that was more resourceful, more present, more grateful. It taught me to find my balance of gratitude for others and doing for myself.
Sometimes renewal finds you even when you’re not looking for it. The key is recognizing the lesson when it arrives and choosing to let it change you rather than just surviving it.
Phase 4: You Integrate Into Your Life
The last part of renewal, often prompted or boosted by a new place, is the inevitable letdown of returning to previous routines. While you were at that Italian villa, everything seemed so clear, and the road to change felt vibrant and rich. But now you’re back home, and that transformed version of yourself feels like it might have been a mirage.
This is where integration becomes crucial. If renewal is stirring in your spirit, the sustainability of this “new you” depends on how well you can weave your insights into everyday life:
Establishing new patterns and routines that honor what you discovered about yourself
Setting boundaries that protect your growth from people and situations that want to pull you back into old patterns
Making choices that align with your renewed self, even when they’re inconvenient or misunderstood
Sharing your transformation with others, not to convince them but to anchor the changes in your own reality
Integration is about becoming the bridge between who you were in that transformative place and who you can be in your regular life.
Without integration, renewal becomes just another vacation story. With it, it becomes the foundation for lasting change.
My Father’s House After He Died. Not exactly a travel destination, but renewal doesn’t always happen in exotic locations. Going through his things, sitting in his kitchen, I reconnected with parts of my family story I’d forgotten. Sometimes renewal is about claiming your roots, not escaping them.
I remembered who I was before I learned to be who I thought I should be.
Since then, I have reached out and welcomed deeper connections with my family. I keep working to maintain those bonds. The renewal happened in recognizing which parts of my heritage and family identity I wanted to carry forward and which patterns I was ready to release. My dad’s house gave me that insight. Now, it’s the daily choices to stay connected that hold the real transformation.
Creating Your Renewal Practice
So with you in the driver seat of renewal firmly established, I now challenge you to seek transformation and fresh starts. Renewal Seekers strive for clarity, have the courage to face fears, and take on challenges. They know that evolution is a healthy part of the human process.
Want more of this in your life? Try out these:
Create Small Disruptions
Renewal requires disrupting your normal patterns. This doesn’t mean you need to quit your job and move to Bali (though if that’s calling you, listen). It means intentionally creating breaks in your routine:
Take a different route to work
Eat dinner for breakfast
Have a conversation with a stranger
Practice Intentional Discomfort
Growth happens at the edge of your comfort zone. Renewal seekers understand this and actively seek experiences that stretch them:
Physical challenges that test your limits
Emotional situations that require vulnerability
Mental puzzles that force new thinking
Embrace a Beginner’s Mind
Renewal requires approaching life with fresh eyes. This means:
Admitting what you don’t know
Learning from people you might normally dismiss
Seeing familiar places as if for the first time
The Courage to Let Places Change You
The real courage of renewal isn’t only in choosing challenging destinations. It’s also in remaining vulnerable to change wherever you are. In fact, it may be easier to visit a transformative place and still leave unchanged than to allow an ordinary place to shift something inside you.
Renewal seekers understand that the goal isn’t to collect experiences. It’s to collect versions of yourself—each one a little clearer, a little braver, a little more authentic than the last.
Dear Renewal Seeker,
Something in you knows it’s time. Maybe you can’t name what needs to change, but you feel that restless energy, that sense that you’ve outgrown your current container.
Thank you for teaching us that renewal doesn’t require a dramatic gesture. It doesn’t need anyone else’s permission. It requires something much simpler and much more difficult: the willingness to show up differently than you have before.
You help us see that the place matters less than our openness to being changed by it.
Continue to trust your instincts about where you need to go. And keep finding different versions of yourself, collecting the courage to become who you’re meant to be next.
The world needs your renewed self. We’re all waiting to meet who you become.
With deep respect,
Natalie
P.S. Whatever place is calling to you right now, even if it seems impossible or impractical, write it down. Sometimes the first step toward renewal is simply acknowledging where you want to go. Feel free to share it below!
